Lovecats! Happy Sunday!
I hope you are well! I’m sorry I missed Thursday’s Come As You Are episode but I was determined to show up today!
This move has taken longer than I anticipated it would and even though I’m still in boxes and not fully settled just yet, mentally I have settled a bit, and that feels AMAZING.
I’ve been in the new house just over two weeks now and while I still was a complete anxious wreck on week one, week two proved to be a completely different story.
I actually started SLEEPING through the night again, and if you’ve ever dealt with anxiety/insomnia, you’ll know what a game-changer sleep is for your mental and physical health. This has felt like a wonderful sign of progress for me as well as a major sense of security and trust and faith that not only have I done the hard thing and made the right decision, but that much of my anxiety was based on the move and the story I was telling myself about the difficult time I was having leaving everything behind instead of focusing on the new and exciting adventure ahead of me.
This quote above came to mind as I was thinking about the massive tug I had to hold onto my past just as I was at the precipice of my future.
However, maybe it’s not that cut and dry? My past is not entirely my past just yet… and maybe it never will be. Maybe it will always be part of my present, as it is part of me, but my grip on it isn’t as tight as it once was, and I can feel a sense of lightness because of it.
Looking back… it didn’t really matter how hard I tried to let it all go… I simply could not do it… but I still leapt… and now I can see clearly how time has a way of guiding us exactly where we need to be if we have enough patience to flow like water around the stones rather than stubbornly staying in the same place, like the stone.
Sometimes we just need the pressure of the water to disturb us and push us out of our comfort zone so we have no choice but to fall into the flow, tumbling and chaotic and scary at first, but to ultimately show us how much better it can be.
xoxo …love, Maegan 🩷
