Reimagining the Self Again... and AGAIN

The one about meeting all the benchmarks, doing all the things and ending up alone, by myself... hoping to get to the “reason” I was never able to have kids... and relief from THE VOID.

I never wanted a career, really, I wanted to be a mom.

I wanted to have a family and I wanted my kids to be involved in my daily, creative life. Sure, there were things I wanted to do, and maybe it seems small, but I never really imagined a life beyond THAT… and when that didn’t happen, I was forced to reimagine a life for myself over and over… and over again.

And now, at a time when most moms (that I know) are starting to feel a bit of freedom and empty nest even, they are probably going through a similar feeling of having to reimagine what their lives are going to look like when their sole focus isn’t their kids anymore.

I actually had that plan... the romanticized version of what I was going to do AFTER raising my kids; I was going to to be a writer. I figured by then I’d finally have time to write all the books and stories I’d kept stored in the back of my brain for years… THEN, I’d have the time to write, I thought.